Why is that Julliard graduate trapped in a glass box behind the front desk? Oh, she's "acting." Beats portraying Chuck E. Cheese, we guess. Rooms are medium-sized—heavenly, with soft beds and whites acting quite right. D.J.s stir Bhangra bouillabaisse in lobby, while iced-out rapper rubs elbows with the first tailored shirt of a newly-employed agency mailroom operative. Get a faux hawk, tattoo, and in-room massage, plus a grilled cheese from the diner at 4am.